If you asked me five years ago where I’d be right now, I’d probably tell you I’d be working full time in whatever career I finally ended up choosing. I’d most likely be married, and probably on the path to having kids. I wouldn’t be in debt. I definitely wouldn’t be living with my parents. In fact, I’d probably tell you I would be living in a completely different state than I am right now. 

Part of that plan was naivety. I didn’t really have much of an idea of how much college or living on your own actually costs. Another factor that contributed to the hiccups in my plan and where I currently am is the fact that we’ve all lived a whole year now in the midst of a global pandemic. There are plenty of other contributing factors, but the biggest reason I’m not where I planned to be is because I made plans. Period.

I didn’t bring my plans to God. I didn’t ask God to direct my steps. I decided what I thought the world (and the church) would define as successful and created my plans around that. Sure, I prayed about the big decisions like what to major in and which college to attend, but looking back, I don’t really think my heart was in the right place. Instead of asking what would bring Him the most glory, I was asking what would bring me the most comfort. God never promised comfort.

I remember early in college being frustrated at some point because I knew that Psalm 37:4 said God would give me the desires of my heart. I didn’t feel like God was giving me anything I wanted. If you read the whole verse, you’ll find that God gives us the desires of our heart when we delight in Him. I was surprised when I learned what the verse actually meant. It doesn’t mean that if we want a job, a relationship, a promotion, a good grade, or a vacation, God is going to give it to us. It means that when we are pursuing God, He will shape our desires to match His desires. He will help us to want the same things that He wants for us.

Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Psalm 37:4

When I remember that my human desires aren’t always best, I realize that it’s not quite as important to be focused on where I will be 5 or 10 years from now. God wants me to focus much more on how I can be serving Him in the present moment. I still don’t know where I will be or what I’ll be doing 3 months from now. There probably hasn’t been a time in my life where I’ve been more confused or uncertain. Even in this uncertain time, where I don’t hear God saying much, I hear Him telling me to wait.

I hear Him telling me to wait for His timing and His plans. Even while I am waiting for Him to answer my prayers with something other than “not yet,” I know that He is working. He is inviting me to see what He is doing in my life now, even if it is not what I have been praying and asking of Him. Even if it’s not the season I would have picked for myself, God wants me to commit what I am doing right now to Him, and He will establish my plans. I can stop planning and start serving.

Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.

Proverbs 16:3

The pressure is off. I don’t have to plan or fight or strive. I don’t need to take on responsibilities I was never meant to have. 

I don’t need to guard my heart. The peace of Christ will do that (Philippians 4:7).

I don’t need to carry the weight of the world. Jesus Christ already won the battle against sin and death (1 Corinthians 15:57)!

I don’t need to achieve perfection. I am justified in Christ Jesus (Romans 5:9).

These are the promises I have. I don’t have a promise of where I’ll be several years from now, but I have a God who is walking with me every step of the way. I have a God who brings beauty from ashes and works miracles and is in the business of turning even the most mundane moments into shouts of glory for Him. After all, our purpose is to glorify God.

I need to be seeking God and loving Him and others, rather than seeking what this world says is successful. Lord, help me not to seek provision, but to seek You, who provides all things.

What prayer do you need to pray? 

Maybe it’s…

Lord, help me not to seek fulfillment, but to seek You, who fulfills all my needs and desires.

Lord, help me not to seek possessions, but to seek You, who is the giver of all good things.

Lord, help me not to seek ________, but to seek You, who _________.

Fill in the blanks. These things we are seeking aren’t inherently bad, but when we are looking for these things and relying on ourselves, instead of bringing our needs to God, we are committing idolatry. We need to stop taking responsibilities upon ourselves that we aren’t meant to have.

Friend, if you’re also here in a place you never thought you’d be, ask yourself what you are missing out on by focusing on the place you were never meant to be, instead of the place you are in right now. What are you supposed to be learning along the journey? 

The Bible tells us to lean not on our own understanding. When we lean on our own understanding, things just don’t make sense. We have to learn to be okay with not understanding what God is doing. We have to trust that God is working everything for our good (Romans 8:28). Even when we aren’t where we hoped we would be. Even when God is telling us to wait. Even when God isn’t answering our prayers how we wish He would. Even when what He is asking us to do doesn’t make sense. The promise in Proverbs is that when we trust in Him and submit to His ways, even when it doesn’t make sense to our human brains, He will make our paths straight. 

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Do you remember the story of Mary and Martha? Martha was concerned about all that needed to be done and got carried away. She missed out on the opportunity to be present with Jesus. Mary chose to sit at the feet of Jesus, delighting in Him, and not worrying about what was going to be happening later. Jesus said Mary chose the better option (Luke 10:38-42). Like Mary, we should try to focus on being present and listening to Jesus. We don’t need to plan our steps or stress out about picking the right path. We don’t need to worry about the 5,000 things to be done each day. We simply need to be present and do what He asks us to do.

Trust God.

Let Him create the plans for your life.

Worship Him in this season.

Let Him place the desires in your heart that He wants you to have.

Choose to be present with Him.

Live to bring Him glory.